fifty frenchmen can't be wrong (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
some_stars) wrote2012-04-20 09:39 pm
some_stars) wrote2012-04-20 09:39 pm
(no subject)
I am feeling both better and worse? It was way worse for a while there, but practicing my music made me feel a little better, both because I feel much more confident about matching my Cell Block Tango solo to the music and not going over, and because I realized that the other song was making some unfair demands on me that it wasn't ridiculous for me not to be able to meet. Which is...unclear, but whatever. This was all after the museum volunteer training this afternoon, which did not go well and not just because of the uncomfortable subtle racist slant to the presenter's archaeological explanations (and a very weird moment of not-at-all-subtle racism against Finns, of all people). And I was very tired and my back hurt from having to move boxes and then sit on the floor yesterday, and I've had a headache all day, and my shoes were not right for the occasion, and it was just a bad time all around. At least I got the training hours to count toward my required twelve.
I'm definitely going down to three days a week at work after this next week, although at that point they may just send me away, or the job might actually be over, IDK. And I decided to put off moving out until after I get back from NYC, in mid-July. And as soon as choir is finished I have to start grad school research. So I'm not quite as close to fully functioning at it seemed for a few weeks there, but I think--no way to tell until the concert is over--I've avoided a full crash. Although I am about to watch some more Princess Tutu episodes even though I already watched two hours of TV tonight with my mom and I have to get up at seven tomorrow for the choir retreat. So that is not a wise decision.
I really wanted to do that meme that's been going around again, where you pick 15 characters and keep them secret and people ask you questions using numbers and then you substitute in the names from the list and answer them? But all my fictional properties lately are ones I've been running through so fast, I don't feel like I have enough of a handle on the characters to write little mini-stories. Plus it's a really weird mix--various anime, Community, Farscape--so probably nobody would know all the characters in the answer to their question. ALSO probably nothing will top the one I did years ago where one of the answers turned out to be Cordelia Chase and Gates the communist insect writing a Nano novel together.
But I wanted to do it because I miss being fannish, because my lately-untreated ADHD has made me so stupid that I can't concentrate long enough to find and read fic (I've also started to have trouble with making words into sentences and then paragraphs that communicate meaning, to the extent that I feel like I've had a tiny stroke). And I can't seem to settle into a fandom, I just keep jumping around, feeding my brain more shiny things, preferably in 20-minute chunks. The only reason I'm able to sit through entire Farscape episodes is because I'm showing it to my mom.
ANYWAY, ugh, what even is this entry. I am so sorry. One day, one distant misty day, I will be in fandom again and post things besides inarticulate whines.
I'm definitely going down to three days a week at work after this next week, although at that point they may just send me away, or the job might actually be over, IDK. And I decided to put off moving out until after I get back from NYC, in mid-July. And as soon as choir is finished I have to start grad school research. So I'm not quite as close to fully functioning at it seemed for a few weeks there, but I think--no way to tell until the concert is over--I've avoided a full crash. Although I am about to watch some more Princess Tutu episodes even though I already watched two hours of TV tonight with my mom and I have to get up at seven tomorrow for the choir retreat. So that is not a wise decision.
I really wanted to do that meme that's been going around again, where you pick 15 characters and keep them secret and people ask you questions using numbers and then you substitute in the names from the list and answer them? But all my fictional properties lately are ones I've been running through so fast, I don't feel like I have enough of a handle on the characters to write little mini-stories. Plus it's a really weird mix--various anime, Community, Farscape--so probably nobody would know all the characters in the answer to their question. ALSO probably nothing will top the one I did years ago where one of the answers turned out to be Cordelia Chase and Gates the communist insect writing a Nano novel together.
But I wanted to do it because I miss being fannish, because my lately-untreated ADHD has made me so stupid that I can't concentrate long enough to find and read fic (I've also started to have trouble with making words into sentences and then paragraphs that communicate meaning, to the extent that I feel like I've had a tiny stroke). And I can't seem to settle into a fandom, I just keep jumping around, feeding my brain more shiny things, preferably in 20-minute chunks. The only reason I'm able to sit through entire Farscape episodes is because I'm showing it to my mom.
ANYWAY, ugh, what even is this entry. I am so sorry. One day, one distant misty day, I will be in fandom again and post things besides inarticulate whines.