fifty frenchmen can't be wrong (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
some_stars) wrote2011-04-22 06:59 pm
some_stars) wrote2011-04-22 06:59 pm
progress report
these will be reoccurring, for my own satisfaction such as it is, over the next seventeen days. they will probably never contain anything interesting.
Research project 1 (Renaissance drama, props) due May 2: About 70 pages left of reading left. Close-to-final draft of second "anthology entry" due on Tuesday, rough draft of 5-7pp introduction due Thursday. The introduction is the major locus of anxiety since it has to have some kind of point, even if not exactly a specific argument.
Research project 2 (proposal paper for the horrible required freshman comp class) due May 6: Two-page paper proposal/plan due Monday, so I need to come up with an actual action that I'm proposing rather than "this program is good!" Then it's just a question of skimming unbelievably long and horribly boring documents and throwing some shit on the page while trying not to go catatonic from the horror of writing something so half-assed. This will probably suck the hardest to write because it's going to be crap and it doesn't MATTER that it's crap, because half the people in this class either are functionally illiterate or just choose to appear so in things they don't care about, like school. And also I don't care what my grade is, not on the paper and not, so long as I pass, in the class. But it's still going to send me into a twitching, weeping panic to write not-wonderful sentences.
Research project 3 (10+ page paper on some as-yet-muddled arrangement of 'Jewish identity' and 'Holocaust survivors' and 'Saul Friedlander's When Memory Comes' and a brief(?) sideroad into 'Jorge Semprun's Le grand voyage') due May 9: Hundreds of pages of reading, I don't even know what after that. This SHOULD be the easiest project because it's more or less what I've done before plenty of times, but it's turning out to be the hardest in terms of actual thought and ideas required. I keep turning away from it to work on the other two because at this point in the semester/the year/my life, my brain is entirely wrung dry and I cannot think new thoughts.
Of course, the closer I get to my hypothetical graduation, the harder it is to keep from thinking about The Future, so every night for the last week has ended in tears and overwrought diary entries in my mood tracker app. ALL WILL COME TO NOTHING, my vanished youth, ruined prospects, etc. etc. When I can briefly avoid contemplating all that, I've been panicking over my trip to NYC and the five whole days I will have, post-finals pre-departure, to plan for it. Also I desperately need a haircut.
Research project 1 (Renaissance drama, props) due May 2: About 70 pages left of reading left. Close-to-final draft of second "anthology entry" due on Tuesday, rough draft of 5-7pp introduction due Thursday. The introduction is the major locus of anxiety since it has to have some kind of point, even if not exactly a specific argument.
Research project 2 (proposal paper for the horrible required freshman comp class) due May 6: Two-page paper proposal/plan due Monday, so I need to come up with an actual action that I'm proposing rather than "this program is good!" Then it's just a question of skimming unbelievably long and horribly boring documents and throwing some shit on the page while trying not to go catatonic from the horror of writing something so half-assed. This will probably suck the hardest to write because it's going to be crap and it doesn't MATTER that it's crap, because half the people in this class either are functionally illiterate or just choose to appear so in things they don't care about, like school. And also I don't care what my grade is, not on the paper and not, so long as I pass, in the class. But it's still going to send me into a twitching, weeping panic to write not-wonderful sentences.
Research project 3 (10+ page paper on some as-yet-muddled arrangement of 'Jewish identity' and 'Holocaust survivors' and 'Saul Friedlander's When Memory Comes' and a brief(?) sideroad into 'Jorge Semprun's Le grand voyage') due May 9: Hundreds of pages of reading, I don't even know what after that. This SHOULD be the easiest project because it's more or less what I've done before plenty of times, but it's turning out to be the hardest in terms of actual thought and ideas required. I keep turning away from it to work on the other two because at this point in the semester/the year/my life, my brain is entirely wrung dry and I cannot think new thoughts.
Of course, the closer I get to my hypothetical graduation, the harder it is to keep from thinking about The Future, so every night for the last week has ended in tears and overwrought diary entries in my mood tracker app. ALL WILL COME TO NOTHING, my vanished youth, ruined prospects, etc. etc. When I can briefly avoid contemplating all that, I've been panicking over my trip to NYC and the five whole days I will have, post-finals pre-departure, to plan for it. Also I desperately need a haircut.