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more kink update
Jun. 5th, 2022 07:04 am went to the National Leather Association’s local chapter’s bar night at a leather bar and I was nervous but I had an INCREDIBLE time and stayed longer than I thought I would just chatting with people and doing a little play and watching some play and getting to know a bunch of folks. it was just a great vibe and a great time and my inability to hear any conversation not pointed right at my face and spoken loudly didn’t interfere as badly as I’d feared it might.
will definitely be going back next month and maybe I can tie someone up, since it won’t be my first time ever by then. (I did get to teach a couple people how to do single and double column ties with my whole two months of expertise, lol.) i also got some practice in setting my own private boundaries about who I will play with and what kinds of play, because i met a woman who I will NEVER let tie me up but would happily let her flog me all day long, bc she seems to understand and value safety protocols in that context (and two people whose judgment i trust, one who knows her well, let her hit them), but she hogtied someone without having the slightest idea how to do it safely, and indeed after a few minutes his fingers were losing color and someone had to point that out to her. it wasn't like a dangerous situation bc it was in public and there were people around who knew more and were watching, but i got the feeling she would have done it in private anyway (with his consent, she's not AWFUL, just...unwise). she is a delightful person but I don’t think she gets how dangerous rope can be. or maybe i'm overreacting, idk, i do like her and hope to do impact play with her next time, but rope will not be on the menu until i see her take it seriously.
speaking of which, i met another rigger (alas a cishet man so not on my personal radar of People I Could Ask, but a great guy) and someone who wants to be a rigger who i would LOVE to be tied by someday and volunteered to be their test dummy, so things are looking up on that front!
will definitely be going back next month and maybe I can tie someone up, since it won’t be my first time ever by then. (I did get to teach a couple people how to do single and double column ties with my whole two months of expertise, lol.) i also got some practice in setting my own private boundaries about who I will play with and what kinds of play, because i met a woman who I will NEVER let tie me up but would happily let her flog me all day long, bc she seems to understand and value safety protocols in that context (and two people whose judgment i trust, one who knows her well, let her hit them), but she hogtied someone without having the slightest idea how to do it safely, and indeed after a few minutes his fingers were losing color and someone had to point that out to her. it wasn't like a dangerous situation bc it was in public and there were people around who knew more and were watching, but i got the feeling she would have done it in private anyway (with his consent, she's not AWFUL, just...unwise). she is a delightful person but I don’t think she gets how dangerous rope can be. or maybe i'm overreacting, idk, i do like her and hope to do impact play with her next time, but rope will not be on the menu until i see her take it seriously.
speaking of which, i met another rigger (alas a cishet man so not on my personal radar of People I Could Ask, but a great guy) and someone who wants to be a rigger who i would LOVE to be tied by someday and volunteered to be their test dummy, so things are looking up on that front!
